Learning from the discomfort
Talking with Mivin Mathew recently, I realised this month is the start of my tenth year doing yoga. I haven't always been consistent. But in the whole nine years I've never dropped it for long enough to stop considering it a part of who I am. Currently, I go to a class four days of most weeks. As we talked about it, Mivin asked me what I'd learned from such a sustained practice.
The answer is something I've reflected on for years. Yoga teachers often ask their students to "stay in the discomfort". Not pain, nobody wants me to hurt myself. But if some stretch, pose, or hold feels uncomfortable to me, can I stay there and explore that feeling? Can I reach right to that limit and sit with it? After a few experiments, I found I can sustain significant discomfort for some length of time. And that next time, my discomfort zone is further away. It's a concept I've taken beyond the physical sensations I experience on the yoga mat.
As an anxious depressive, I find discomfort everywhere. New practices, unfamiliar circumstances, social situations. They're all difficult and uncomfortable. Avoiding discomfort has always been hard, and it compounds the effects. Now I ask myself if there is value in staying in this specific discomfort. Can I learn something from this? Does it open up new opportunities if I become used to it? Is there a benefit here?
Challenging oneself is always uncomfortable. Learning to sit with that, reflect on it, and look for the value is one way I've learned to keep at it.